Pet Peeve #5: Starving and Vomiting

It's always amazing to me to see how quickly people feel better when they are admitted to the hospital. When I say this, I am not marvelling at the wonderful effects of pharmaceuticals or at the great quality of care we give as Nurses. Oh no. I only wish our touch were so effective. I am talking of those folks who are admitted to our Labor and Delivery Unit for "nausea and vomiting."

Now, first of all, do you really call your Doctor or go to the Emergency Room because you feel nauseated or because you have vomited when you are pregnant? Isn't that kind of an expected side effect of pregnancy? But let's say you do. Personally, I would expect that the vomiting would be so bad that by the time you call the Doctor, that you have been throwing up for days and days and are desperately, dangerously dehydrated. I would expect that you have not been able to keep food down several days straight, and you would certainly be holding a vomit bucket.

I admitted a patient the other day with "nausea and vomiting." She wasn't even close to the above scenario. She was about 30 weeks and had throw up once. Seriously?! SERIOUSLY?! Usually when someone is admitted with such a diagnosis, I try to move quickly so that I can get them comfortable with IV fluids and an anti-emetic at least. Upon learning about this patient's one vomiting episode, I'll admit, I didn't move so fast. As I went through the admission process, asking the required questions, the Patient interupts me to ask: "Can I have something to eat?"

Why on God's green Earth would you show up to the hospital with complaints of nausea and vomiting and ask for FOOD?! Are you freaking kidding me?! My theory is this: if you are so sick that you need to be admitted to the hospital for nausea and vomiting, the last thing you need to be doing is eating! I've been nauseated before and I've thrown up before. I know that if it's real, you have no desire to be downing food! Let be real. Besides, I don't like cleaning up vomit!

Night Shift

Can I just say I am so thankful to be working the Day Shift?! I worked the Night Shift for years and despised every moment of it... creeping into people's rooms in the darkness, wishing for a 5.11 Flashlight so you don't trip over their belongings or get tangled in their IV and take it down... trying to wake folks up gently but they awaken with a start and sometimes a scream... doing procedures that the patient doesn't even remember 2 hours later because of sleeping pills... not to mention the complete lack of a life outside the hospital. Ah, yes. Bless the Day Shift.

Who's the Babydaddy?

As a Labor and Delivery nurse, I think I've received every sort of reception in the book. So when I walked in to a couple's room the other day and introduced myself, I was hardly fazed by the folded arms, icy stares and lack of response.

"OK, then! Nice to meet you all!" Quite frankly, I earn my living whether you talk to me or not. I usually would rather make it a pleasant day, but hey! Whatever floats your boat, right?! I'll admit, I said it a little sarcastically, though... I can't figure out how people think it's ok to be so rude in such a situation. Do they act this way on the street? At a party? With friends? I don't get it...

I chatter on, seemingly oblivious to the complete lack of response or interaction. Whether they answer me or not, I'm going to tell them all about the c/section they are about to experience. Like it or not. As I finish my shpeel, another young man and a middle-aged woman enter.

"Ok, if there aren't any questions, I will leave you all to visit. Please call me if you need anything." I leave the room.

The couple that just entered the room follow right behind me. "Could I speak with the medical personel responsible for Daniela?" the young man asks me. Oooooo! Sounds official! "I'm Deborah, I will be her nurse. What can I do for you?"

He very respectfully explains to me that he is the babydaddy and that he would like to be present in the c/section. Ok. Act cool. I've seen worse. Honestly, I have, but I always wonder what this pregnant girl has got that has her getting more action than me! I send him off to the Family Waiting Room and head back in to the room to clarify the situation with the patient. Could you not have told me about this?!

Now the only way I know how to deal with this sort of sticky situation is to be upfront. "I've been asked by the baby's father that he attend the delivery..." there is a loud moan from Insignificant Other in the corner as he drops his head dramatically into his hands... "Can you clarify your plans with me so that we can make arrangements to best suit your wishes?" I get a big blank stare. Ok, so maybe we're just the stupid people. "Is the baby's daddy going into the c/section with you?" "Uh, Yeah!" she responds, dripping in sarcasm, like I'm the stupid person. "Will he also be getting the baby band, giving him full access to the baby?" "Yeaaaaah" Again, like I'm a moron. You're welcome for attending to your wishes.